I Hate Yoga and Meditation

I admit it: I hate yoga and meditation.

That’s right. I’m a Southern California beach girl, raised by a hippie, working in the self-improvement and health industry… and I hate yoga and meditation. Like really, really dislike them. I find them dull and boring, and every time I try either one, all I can think about is when I get to be done.

I’ve heard that doing yoga four times a week will change your body. Like, literally change the way it’s shaped — not just in a weight-loss way. I’ve also heard that meditating for 20 minutes twice a day for a month (or something like that) will radically change your life — for the better, of course. Given that knowledge, I find it odd that I don’t do either on a regular basis.

One could point out that 40 minutes of meditation every single day and 90 minutes of yoga four times a week is a serious time commitment. And one could counter that starting with five minutes of meditation twice a day and one yoga class, plus three or four additional days of 10 minutes of stretching, would already be more than what I’m doing now.

One would be right.

So why don’t I do it?

I think it’s the same reason I don’t eat five servings of vegetables a day: because I don’t wanna.

Like, in a five-year-old temper tantrum, I’m-a-damn-grown-up-and-isn’t-it-enough-that-I-pay-taxes-work-out-eat-healthy-ish-sleep-eight-hours-a-night-and-go-to-the-dentist kind of way. When is enough good-for-you-but-not-necessarily-very-fun stuff enough? Where does one draw the line?

I believe each of us gets to decide where that line is. And as long as you’re drawing it consciously, on purpose, and with awareness, I think that’s perfectly healthy.

For me, that line is somewhere between unemployed, living-with-my-parents, 100-pounds-overweight, never-going-outside-or-eating-real-food person… and self-made millionaire bodybuilder whose entire life revolves around nutrition and working out.

I am forever striving for perfect moderation.

Moderation. Ugh. That’s a topic for a future post.

So where’s your line? When is enough, enough? And — here’s the kicker — how do you not beat yourself up for skipping yoga and not doing two 20-minute meditation sessions every day?

No, I’m seriously asking.

Here’s what I’ve decided is “enough” for me:

Sleep: 7–8 hours every single night.

Exercise: 30–90 minute workouts, 5 days a week. Stretching and foam rolling before and after.

Liquids: 10oz of coffee and a shake in the morning, then water the rest of the day. Two vodka tonics once every few months.

Sugar: Almost none, other than fruit.

TV: Roughly 3–4 hours total per week.

Meditation: 5 minutes every morning. (Full disclosure: currently not doing it.)

Yoga: Zero times per week.

Creating: As often as possible, but at least a few hours once a week.

Nature: As often as possible… but currently not much at all. More full disclosure: I live 1 mile from the beach and don’t even go weekly. Yes, I’m ashamed. And yes, I'll regret not going more if I ever live farther away from the beach.

Therapy: Weekly for now.

So that’s my line. Imperfect, evolving, sometimes ignored — but mine.

What’s yours?

Subscribe